Somehow, the idea was created that it is solely the parent’s job to raise children. “They are difficult at school because they aren’t being raised right at home.” This fallacy begins in believing that raising children somehow stops when you go to work.
Raising a child doesn’t stop because you went to work. But if you’re at work how do you raise your child? Women everywhere are torn between choosing between their careers and family finances and raising their children. (43% of moms quit their jobs to raise kids) You can have both, and it’s easier than you think. Matter-of-fact, you can have both, not only guilt free, but with a whole new level of excitement.
Easy answer: Get on the same page with your daycare operation about how to raise your child. Make sure they are okay with co-parenting with you. Not everyone will co-parent, so interviewing the right place and doing your due diligence is key.
Co-Parenting – verb; two or more parties who are sharing the duty of raising a child
Primary Caregiver – noun; you, the parents
Secondary Caregiver – noun; us, the providers
Hard answer: Not every daycare wants the responsibility of raising your child. So it will take a few steps to find what you’re looking for.
- You first need a daycare that puts your child’s interests first with a legal fiduciary duty baked into their contract. In the article linked above, you’ll discover how without this duty, co-parenting and loving your child is almost impossible. Ask them if they serve as a legal fiduciary to your child. If not, that doesn’t necessarily mean they don’t take the duty seriously, but they just may not understand what that means.
- You need to find a daycare that has a “rearing philosophy” that you agree with. We recommend a “gentle” or “respectful” approach versus the forceful methods of institutional learning that crush independence and stifle autonomy. (You can learn more about our approach) When interviewing your daycare, ask them if they are willing to help you raise your child, and then ask if they have a specific rearing philosophy.
- Visit at least 3 daycares including in-home daycares. It’s easy to get seduced by big beautiful locations, but it requires an intimate location with minimal to zero staff turn-over to really co-parent with your daycare.
We believe children are raised by a “village” and as secondary caregivers, it is part of our duty to raise your child while you are busy “adulting”. We follow a specific technique for raising children based on modern science and ancient wisdom, and is something you can get excited about. Co-parenting is also our legal obligation by including it into the contract!
Excerpt from our contract:
Children suddenly do not stop being raised when you go to work. In this way it is our responsibility to not only care for your child, but to support you as a parent. – Just as raising your child doesn’t end when you send them to school, supporting you and your child doesn’t end when you pick up your child for the day. We are a team, on call, for the good and the bad.
If you’re looking for someone to help you co-parent, we might be able to help you. We’re growing and might have a daycare as part of our network near you.
If there isn’t a daycare near you that follows your values, you might be interested in learning how to run your own! We’ll teach you!
-From the founders
Rubria & Adrian Abascal
